So last week my sister gets into a VERY minor car accident (I.E. No damage whatsoever but the guy she bumped is a real dick) and in panic my mother called my father to get some advice.
My father meanwhile is on a boat in Islamorada for the weekend with his precious buddies most likely and being his normal narcissistic egocentric self and says that there is NO possible way that he could receive a phone call because his precious headset is broken and he'd have to get a new one and . . .
can you smell the bullshit or do i have to keep showing you more?
ANYWAYS, he tells me that he's deleted my mother's voice mail without even listening to it, and that he'd be out of contact until he gets back Sunday. Which i relay to my mother and stuff gets bad FAST. He starts to not respond to any of my texts, which i DEMAND that he call me (cuz god forbid he goes below decks or use the phone ON BOARD).
So my sister texts him basically saying "well it could have been worse, but thanks for showing how much you care," and all of a sudden he's backpedaling and the pile starts getting higher and higher and REALLY reeking.
Saturday morning at ONE AM i get an e-mail from him basically telling me that even though i want NOTHING to do with him he's still going to try to contact me, and that my mother is/was never supposed to call him in emergencies. . . that she could only text him. . . My first thought is WHAT THE HELL!? the next is merely oh whatever you sad excuse for a man.
But then my mother gets TWELVE text messages from him, accusing her of calling him on purpose just to make sure that he pissed both myself and my sister off because HE showed he didnt care about what happened to his daughters (My sister and I basically said the same thing to my mom "What does one of us have to be in the hospital, dead or dying for him to sit up and take notice?"). He also accuses her of forcing us away from him, and that it would cause "long term damage to all relationships they have with men", and that whatever reply, however logical would be "hateful".
Umm. . . Mom taught me to love, to hug, to smile, to see all the beauty in the world even in the little things. HE was the one that made his friends more of a priority over his goddamn family! HE is the one that left us, abandoned us, showed us that the man we trusted, the man that made the most who helped provide a room over our heads would walk out of our home and our lives with little to no provocation other than the fact that he couldnt handle his own guilt and being held repsonsible for his actions.
But its all my mother's fault that this has happened and all my mother's fault that I will probably never trust the male race ever again, all because he left us without a word, just uprooted all of us violently and carelessly.
Yes you bastard, blame my mother, blame her for your shortcomings yet again.
We shall see who rises and who falls.
Yes you bastard, blame my mother, blame her for your shortcomings yet again.
We shall see who rises and who falls.
Ok he really sounds like a B@$$tard to me but not all men are like that. I know it is hard to believe me coming from another man, but give life a chance.
ReplyDeleteI had the same experience only with the mother of my children. I was lucky enough to find a soulmate after(who later died of cancer)
I have found another in bobbie whom I have been with for 12 yrs now. So keep your chin up!
I read this with some concern! Not all guys can be tarred with the same brush as your Dad. If you go through life distrusting every male person then you'll be forever looking over your shoulder. You could be entirely unlucky and then the guy around the next corner could be the right guy. Life is full of pit falls, I know I've climbed out of many. But if you're ever lucky enough to find the right one remember this you don't have to behave as your father has.
ReplyDeleteBe true unto them that are true unto you.
And sod the rest.
surrogate dad! lol
Kira not every man is as you say there is lots of good caring and honest decent men out there you just have to choose wisely and observe before you give yourself to love...
ReplyDeleteI love you, your sister & your mom - HOWEVER WTF was she thinking calling him. Really, as if he was going to do anything anyway (whether he was local of not). Really can't tell me any of you expected anything more from him. Come On!
ReplyDeletep.s this is lisa
Unfortunate as it is, with a person like that nothing can be done to change them. You know this. They will continually make excuses and justify their childish behavior. They never will admit their faults and will always put the blame on other people that are easier to attack because of their gentle nature. I went through a similar situation. My father was glorified in my eyes and my mother the horrid bitch. But I came to find out later in my life that I was living in ignorance from my whole family. In order for me to grow up in an untainted structured home they hid the beast my father actually was. In fact my mother was not the cause of anything and was only struggling everyday to juggle every piece of my family. My father cheated on my mother when I was 15, and probably more than that, I just don't know the truth from the lies anymore. And ever since that time the marriage had gone to shit. No one told me and they let me sit there and worship my father and hate the very woman who tried to keep me safe. After my brother and I were out of the house she felt her duty of the family was over and left the man that kept her prisoner for 13 years of dishonesty and betrayal. She has now found refuge in the house of the lord and walks in his light. He is the only man in her life. Her mind has been permanently scarred from her marriage with my father and will probably never date again. Its a terrible reality that some men can be that way. Just keep your heart safe from scum like that.
ReplyDelete